Friday Funny Spam of the Day

I got a lot of spam: an actual true lot! My main work email has been on the web since 1996 and been scraped and added to every “CD list of email addresses of folks interested in _YOUR PRODUCT HERE_” since the dishonest among us figured out people would pay for a list of names and email addresses.

Hell, I get advertisements for dentistry equipment and conferences. (I’m an IT guy at a university in the college of education; go figure!)

Also, postmaster, webmaster and many other aliases at multiple domains deliver mail (mostly spam) to me.

For the most part, I just report spammers (using SpamCOP) and toss them into my massive SPAM folder. Once a year, I archive the previous calendar year’s worth of SPAM (for posterity?).

Often, I get a laugh from the cluelessness of spammers. Today, Mr. John Hancock sent me a spam with an attached document that requires my signature! Now that’s funny! I enjoyed it so much, I’ll share it with you:

Attention:
Kindly see attached offical Undelivered Package Notification Letter.
Contact us as soon as possible.
John H.
Recommended by the Legal 500 2013-2014
Cargo Manager
 DFW International Airport
 3200 East Airfield Drive DFW Airport, TX 75261
 www.dfwairport.com

Regulated by the Airport Regulation Authority. DFW International
Airport is the trading name of DFW Airport, a limited liability
partnership, registered number OC322707, registered in United States. A
list of partners (i.e. members of the Airport) is open to inspection at
the above address.

IMPORTANT NOTICE:
This message may contain confidential or legally privileged
information. If you are not the addressee of this e-mail please reply
to the sender immediately by e-mail and do not disclose, store or make
use of this information. Communicating by e-mail carries certain risks
which include delay, corruption of data, non-delivery, wrongful
interception, amendment and other dangers. If you communicate with us
by e-mail we will take it that you have assumed the risks involved in
using such a medium. We do not accept service of proceedings or of
notices by e-mail. No responsibility is accepted for the contents of
e-mails unconnected with our business.

I particularly liked the offical (sic) nature of this message. And the strange way the address was written, implying that Dallas-Fort Worth is in Airport, Texas.

Here’s another one I liked. It seems that someone, putatively named Erica Smith, wants to sell me some sex-offenders:

Safety Notice for: REDACTED@nullnunyerbizness.com

Learning about sex-offenders who live near your loved ones can be
alarming. The website you are about to access contains actual
sex-offender information. Please use extreme caution when utilizing
this service.  To be a responsible parent you must know this
information.

Go here to keep your children safe from predators http://jointoday.psfcp.com

Best Regards,

Erica Smith
Neighborhood Safety Awareness

Alert #11638598

Fake Erica! why are you telling me this? “As a responsible parent, I “must know this!” (Have you been reading Richard Bach’s  Illusions? Teaching me what I already know?)

I also like their website: JointOday@. (Bzzzzzzzzzzzzz)

And it’s good to know she’s selling “actual sex offenders.” I get so tired of the poorly-copied clone sex offenders.

Happy Slacking!
Stu…

 

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